Experts in Grief: Edinburgh funeral directors first to undertake inaugural grief training

It goes without saying that the job of a funeral director can be mentally taxing and stressful and while some may say it is part of the job, over time it can take its toll.

That’s why the independent Edinburgh funeral directors, William Purves, is acknowledging that their profession poses risks to colleagues’ mental health and has therefore working with leading bereavement charity, Cruse’s inaugural Grief First Aid training.

With over 125 years of experience in the business, the family-owned funeral firm is no stranger to carefully navigating the complexities of grief.

Nonetheless, in the aftermath of the pandemic, which saw countless lives affected by grief – including members of the funeral team – William Purves stepped up to become one of the first businesses to trial this new initiative to better support anyone who may be suffering as a result of loss, grief or bereavement. 

Hazel Strachan, a William Purves Administrator and one of the course attendees said: “Our job takes us to the heart of families who are coping with one of life’s most challenging experiences – never more so than during the pandemic. During this time, we prioritised the care of others over processing the impact on our own lives – which has led to a storing up of emotions.

“Funeral Directors are also not immune to bereavement in our own lives – events from many years ago can be triggered by aspects of the job, which creates an unexpected emotional response.”

Cruse’s Grief First Aid course comprises three online modules, each four hours in length. 20 representatives from William Purves undertook the course, covering topics including ‘understanding grief’ and ‘the importance of bereavement policy’.

The participants also developed practical skills focused on facilitating conversations around grief and how best to support a colleague returning to work following a bereavement. Upon finishing the training, each representative received a certification of completion.

Gemma Halley, HR Manager who enlisted William Purves’ onto the course, said: “As a team we are now equipped with a much deeper understanding of how grief impacts everyday life. Crucially, we now have the knowledge to recognise signs of need within the workplace which we may have otherwise overlooked and the skills to respond to that need.

“While hard to select one key takeaway from the training, the importance of recognising that everyone’s experience of grief is individual to them and that the power of listening cannot be underestimated will be invaluable.

“Treating our colleagues with compassion throughout their grief journey and ensuring they feel heard, respected and supported early on can potentially stave off far more serious consequences as well as strengthen and build internal bonds of support.”  

Rachel Argyle, a representative of Cruse said: “We were very excited that William Purves agreed to undertake our inaugural Grief First Aid Training.

“Given that they care for grieving families every day, their understanding of bereavement was already very high, and they were well equipped with key skills to support those suffering.

“Where the training resonated most was in giving staff the tools to recognise when fellow colleagues might be triggered by a funeral or life event, and to be more confident in initiating conversations around grief in the workplace.”

Bereavement charity provides “warmth and good humour” for bereaved people across Edinburgh

Cruse Scotland, a Scottish charity that provides essential support to people struggling with bereavement following the loss of a loved one, has been able to extend its vital Early Support Programme following a fourth significant financial boost from Scotmid Funerals.

The funding has supported people across Edinburgh to better cope with each stage of grief, through one-to-one and group support sessions with trained volunteers.

Edinburgh-based Brian, who sadly lost his brother suddenly in 2021 and his mother the following year, shares how he benefited from speaking to Cruse Scotland:

“I can’t talk highly enough of my experience with Cruse Scotland. My counsellor was amazing – extremely professional, highly perceptive, and responsive to the finer nuances of the conversations we had.

“Each session I found hit the right balance of challenging yet supportive, and it was all done with warmth and good humour. It was exactly what I needed at exactly the right time, and I feel the benefit of it every day.”

Last year, Scotmid Funerals donated £8,000 to extend Cruse Scotland’s Early Support services and this year, the funeral provider has made a further £10,000 award.

This latest funding will allow Cruse Scotland to develop its volunteer recruitment and training programme to upskill its crucial volunteers in 2023-24 to continue its support to bereaved people in Edinburgh and the rest of Scotland.

Collective grief and shared loss: the psychology of national mourning

Collective grief and shared loss, the psychology of national mourning

Following the sad passing of Queen Elizabeth II, many people will be grieving and feeling loss. Psychologists from the British Psychological Society (BPS) have explained the psychology behind collective grief and national mourning, and how to cope if the death of the Queen triggers emotion and grief for you.

Professor Nichola Rooney, a chartered member of the BPS, explains the idea of collective grief, but also that we will all experience it slightly differently: “Collective grief is how we describe the reaction of a group of people (usually a nation, region or community) who experience the death of a significant figure from that nation/community or experience multiple deaths.

“While many will mourn individually, what we are witnessing so clearly in the media is the expression of collective grief. For many of us the death of Queen Elizabeth II has been the first time grief had been so widely displayed and discussed at a national level, with the numerous events and rituals and constant media coverage.

“It’s important to remember however that while grief is universal and is a normal response to loss that we will all experience during our lifetime, while there are some acknowledged similar experiences and reactions to loss, grief is unique to all of us. It is determined by our relationship with the deceased, to the meaning of their loss and how it effects our life.”

As well as collective grief, for many they may be experiencing, ‘re-grief’, with the death of the Queen and the media coverage triggering grief and emotions for loved ones lost, no matter how long ago they passed.

“Talking about dying is not something that we do very well in Western cultures, so this collective grief can often be difficult to deal with,” says Professor Rooney. “It can feel overwhelming and it can also trigger feelings about our own losses and experiences of grief and exacerbate existing psychological distress.

“For some people who lost loved ones during the pandemic there may be some feelings of resentment that the death of the monarch has involved so many memorials and opportunities to express grief. During the pandemic these rituals were denied to the grieving and our unprocessed collective grief from the pandemic, has undoubtedly been touched. But for all of us, the death of Queen Elizabeth and the huge media coverage can trigger grief for loved ones who have died, no matter how long ago.

“While this is a difficult time for many, there can actually be some benefits to seeing others mourn a loss in such an open way. It can give us permission to revisit our own experiences and to express our own grief again. We can find comfort through our connection to others with the same lived experience.”

If you are struggling following the death of a loved one, or increased anxiety/feelings of loss following the Queen’s death, the following places can serve as sources of support:

National Grief Awareness Week – 78% of us have NEVER spoken to a GP about bereavement

At the start of National Grief Awareness Week, Cruse Bereavement Support and the Royal College of GPs are announcing an exciting new partnership to strengthen bereavement support and understanding of grief for people across the UK.

In an important step for UK healthcare, the partnership aims to highlight just how impactful grief can be on a person’s physical and mental health.

New research released today by Cruse, shows that over three-quarters of adults in Britain (78%) have never spoken to a GP about a bereavement*.

With this staggering figure in mind, Cruse and the RCGP are making clear to people who may need additional support after experiencing a bereavement, whether recent or in the past, that they can connect with their GP practice team.

This will give GP teams the opportunity to identify people who may need additional support from bereavement services as well as offering information and advice on support available.

With support from a grant of more than £574,000 from The National Lottery Community Fund the largest funder of community activity in the UK, this campaign will supply GPs nationwide with a toolkit supporting them to provide consistent and compassionate support for grieving patients.

The toolkit also provides information and products for patients and healthcare staff – including an animation on the new partnership, a patient poster for all GP surgeries on bereavement and grief and a VBA (very brief advice) card for practice staff.

Sadly, nearly everyone will be affected by bereavement at some point in their life and it is vital that the right support is available and known for people who need it.

This exciting initiative delivered by Cruse Bereavement Support in partnership with The RCGP, is a big step toward ensuring healthcare groups and bereavement support charities are working in partnership to provide the best bereavement support for grieving people.

Steven Wibberley, Chief Executive of Cruse Bereavement Support comments: “Understanding grief and how it can affect your health is the first step towards getting the support you need – and GPs and practice teams can play a really important role in helping grieving people with this.

“That’s why we are so pleased to be collaborating with the RCGP in this important campaign to bridge the gap between healthcare and bereavement support. It’s our hope that this partnership will also ensure all grieving people, especially those who may feel alone and unsure of where to get help, are able to access the right support when they so desperately need it.”

Dr Catherine Millington-Sanders, Clinical Lead for Palliative and End of Life Care for the Royal College of General Practitioners comments: “After a bereavement, it’s natural to want and ask for support. Many people find support from their friends, family or community networks but others may be really struggling with their grief and find more formal support helpful.

“GP practices are a valued and important source of information, support and advice in our communities. This work between the RCGP and Cruse aims to equip GP practice teams with the tools to help identify people with bereavement needs and accessible information to sign-post people to appropriate bereavement support, ensuring the bereaved person is at the centre of every step.”

Scotmid Funerals donates £10K to two Edinburgh charities

THOUSANDS OF SCOTS TO BENEFIT FROM BOOSTED BEREAVEMENT SUPPORT FOLLOWING £10K DOUBLE DONATION FROM SCOTMID FUNERALS

Two Edinburgh-headquartered charities that provide services and support for the bereaved across Scotland, have received a welcome boost following a donation from a Scottish funeral care provider – to the sum of £10,000.

Scotmid Funerals, part of the Scotmid Cooperative which exists to serve the communities in which it operates, made the donations as part of its Covid Community Fund, which has seen more than 300 organisations benefit from financial support since lockdown began earlier in the year.

Cruse Scotland, which offers support for around 5000 bereaved people every year, via a helpline and one to one counselling sessions, has received a £7500 donation from Scotmid Funerals which will be used to support the many people who have found themselves grieving in isolation or not being able to attend funerals due to lockdown.

The funding will go towards the cost of running Cruse Scotland’s helpline and one-to-one services, which are available to everyone who has faced the passing of a loved one, regardless of the cause of death, anyone who is bereaved in lockdown or has been affected by the impact of the pandemic.

Keith Robertson, chief executive of Cruse Scotland, welcomed the donation. He said: “The helpline is a compassionate listening service that offers people guidance about grief, reassurance that their feelings are normal and information on how to access further support.

“We have found that during lockdown, calls are more complex as people are grieving in isolation, they may not have attended funerals and many more are feeling anxious about Covid-19.

“The generous donation from Scotmid Funerals will help us to ensure that anyone who is grieving, wherever they are, will be able to access the help and support they need to get through a very difficult period of their lives.  

The Scottish Partnership for Palliative Care (SPPC), which works to enable communities and individuals to support each other during hard times, has received a £2500 donation from Scotmid Funerals in the wake of Covid-19, which has resulted in many people finding themselves either experiencing declining health, without the usual family support or grieving the loss of a loved one in isolation.

The funding will go towards Good Life, Good Death, Good Grief (GLGDGG), a Scotland-wide alliance set up in 2011 which works collectively to raise awareness on ways to cope with dying, death and bereavement. 

Mark Hazelwood, chief executive of the SPPC, welcomed the donation. He said: “Declining health, death and bereavement affects everyone at some point.  Our work is about ensuring that people are as well prepared as they can be and can get the care and support they need during those hard times. other. 

“We are really delighted to receive this generous donation from Scotmid Funerals.  It will help us to continue our work which we know can make a big difference for people during a very difficult period of their lives.” 

James Blackburn, head of funerals for Scotmid Funerals, said: “End of life care and looking after those who are bereaved are both areas which need to be managed sensitively and compassionately.

“Our donations to both charities will help ensure that anyone who needs support in end of life care or to cope with the loss of a loved one, will be able to get it. It will help make sure that nobody feels that they need to go through this by themselves – and that can often be the first step in the healing process.

“I am delighted that we are able to make these contributions and help make a little difference to people across Scotland.”