BBC ALBA explores male suicide in Scotland

One in 100 deaths worldwide are connected to suicide. In Scotland, that accounts for over 700 people a year and three-quarters of these are men.

A new BBC ALBA Trusadh documentary, Big Boys Don’t Cry, will air during National Suicide Awareness Week on Monday 9 September at 9pm with presenter Derek ‘Pluto’ Murray meeting people whose lives have been affected by mental health struggles and suicide.

Professor Rory O’Connor from the University of Glasgow, is Professor of Health Psychology, Director of the ‘Suicidal Behaviour Research Laboratory’, and leads research into suicide and self-harm.

Discussing the support available, Professor O’Connor says: “We did some work recently looking at trying to understand male suicide specifically and one of the messages that came back time and time again was that the services and support out there are not tailored to their needs.

“We have this traditional model of expecting men to go to clinical services; well, that might work for some people, but what about actually going to places that men are? Why don’t we go to places like football clubs, rugby clubs, the shinty club, whatever it might be, and use that as a mechanism of support?”

This is particularly important in a rural context. Professor O’Connor continues:

“We’re trying to make sense of why the suicide rates are particularly high there. Part of that is linked to access to services, and part of that is linked to the fact that if you live in rural communities, the likelihood of being socially isolated is increased.

“There’s also this idea people talk about of ‘living in a fish bowl’, that you’re less likely to talk about your emotions, your feelings, or if there’s problems going on in your life because you’re concerned about what your neighbours or friends might think.

“Reaching out for help is a sign of strength, it’s not a sign of weakness, so we need to engrain that in our young people. But we also need to ensure that the services and support out there is tailored to these men.”

Patrick Mullery from the ‘James Support Group’ explains: “We offer support – monthly meetings in various locations. There’s 10 actually, all the way from Thurso down to Fort William, across to Elgin, Inverness and lots of places in between.

“It’s a group setting, it’s specifically for people who are bereaved by a suicide but also for people who have suicidal thoughts. We bring those two types of people together for mutual support and understanding – the hope is that people who have suicidal thoughts will see the devastation that is left behind in an attempt to give them another barrier to stop them going that extra step.

“To actually just make them stay with us and realise that they are loved and they would be missed.

“We’ve all got emotions and we have to break the stigma around poor mental health and about suicide. Boys can cry and the best thing to do for yourself, if you’re in a bad place, is talk about it. Unfortunately, suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem.”

In Glasgow, Derek visits Drumchapel-based charity ‘Men Matter Scotland’ to find out more about their approach to offering support and how they have created a safe place for men to visit. 

From street outreach to the facilities available at the welcoming hub, the team hope to build a self-sustaining and secure model that can be shared with other parts of Scotland.

Vice chair D I Brown says: “What is most important is that people talk. If people don’t start to speak about this, it will be hidden and more men will die from suicide. I’d say that people need to open up and be open.”

Professor O’Connor adds: “People sadly still believe that if you ask somebody about suicide, or if you talk about suicide, that you make it more likely that you’ll plant the idea in somebody’s head. There’s no evidence for that. Indeed, the evidence is for the opposite – suicide prevention is everyone’s business – and I mean that sincerely.

“We all have a role that we can play in preventing suicide. Anything we can do, no matter how big or small – a WhatsApp message, a text message, a phone call – anything that reaches out to someone who might be struggling, that sense of connection could be potentially lifesaving.

“I would encourage everybody and anybody, if you’re concerned about a loved one, a friend, a colleague, please reach out… That sense of human connection could save a life.”

Filmed and produced by Stornoway-based MacTV, Big Boys Don’t Cry premieres on BBC ALBA and BBC iPlayeron Monday 9 September at 9pm (in Gaelic with English subtitles).

Watch live or on demand: https://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/m0022vyn