It’s likely we’ve all heard them before. Reasons why men might not get medical help when they need it, or why isolation grows around them like a dark cloak.
How many times have you or a man in your life said something like this?
“Ach, it’s only a cough.”
“Get help? Nah, I don’t want to waste anyone’s time.”
“I’ll just stay in – I prefer my own company anyway.”
Recent news about the health of the King has put men’s health into the spotlight, but every year tens of thousands of men put off getting the care they need until it is urgent – either because they don’t know where to go or because they’re reluctant or embarrassed to reach out.
Members of the Men’s Shed in Govan want to change that, and they’ve teamed up with NHS Greater Glasgow and Clyde to help men get over their embarrassment, or put aside their reluctance, and get the help they need.
Here four members, each of whom has a particular reason to be thankful to the Shed, tell their stories – and share a simple message that might just save a life.
Martin Haddow, age 72
Govan Men’s Shed Chairman
Martin is a survivor of prostate cancer, and its aggressive nature meant doctors had to act fast.
He said: “It all started when I noticed I needed to pee more often than usual, and when I needed to go it was quite urgent.
“I also experience a slight weight loss and a few other things associated with prostate cancer so, rather than leave it, I sought immediate help from my doctor.
“I was referred to the urology department at Glasgow Royal Infirmary where I had the works – scans, blood tests etc.
“When the results came back I was told I had cancer, and it was aggressive. The urologist told me I needed to get my prostate removed and if I didn’t I would maybe live five or six years.”
For Martin there really was no choice to make and he opted to go ahead with the surgery.
“It ultimately saved my life,” he said – and because of that life-saving decision, Martin is encouraging all other men not to wait, and to get checked out if they have any doubts about their health.
“Don’t put it off, because you never know when it will be too late. Your health can’t wait – it’s as simple as that.”
Frank Murphy, age 62
Founder member
Frank is a survivor of testicular cancer, and he knows the value of going to get checked out.
“When I found a lump I went straight down to the GP. Yes it’s embarrassing, but this is what they’re trained for. That was in 2005 and because I got in there early I’ve never had a problem since.”
He’s heard far too many men saying they’d leave a problem – sometimes until it’s too late.
“If only they’d said ‘hing on a minute, something’s no’ right here’ and got straight down to the doctor,” he said.
“If you have a cough that won’t go away, or find a lump or something, acting macho won’t help you. We have the best docs and nurses, but there’s only so much they can do. So, please, get seen early – don’t leave it until it’s too late.
“Don’t be the guy who died of embarrassment because you were too feart to go to go to the doctor.”
John Devlin, 65
Founder member
John also had a lump on his testicle and got it checked out.
“People think the lump will go away,” he said, “but then six months later it might have spread. You cannae shirk on your own health, so if you have any worries, go and see someone.
“My motto is if in doubt check it out.”
But for John, a cancer scare was only part of the story – the bigger issue in his life was mental rather than physical.
“I was going through a bad time before we opened this Men’s Shed. It was the isolation – I was struggling.
“But this place has been a huge help. I come here, and there’s so much going on – so much laughter – that it really helps.”
Arthur Bisset, 62
Member for two years
Arthur had a stroke at work seven or eight years ago, and from that day he started on a path to serious isolation.
“I just shut myself away,” he said. “The stroke left me with some physical difficulties, and because of that I wouldn’t leave the house.
“I was so embarrassed – worried and frightened what people would say, that they would see me in a different light and as disabled.”
Eventually a friend persuaded Arthur to go along to the Govan Shed – and within weeks it had completely changed his life.
“Looking back I was terrified to leave the house, but once I got here it was great. Here I was just one of the boys. They treated me like I was normal, and within a month I wouldn’t be without it.
“This place has given me my confidence and independence back.”
And Arthur’s message to anyone who might be in the same position as him?
“At some point you might think you’re useless, that everything’s behind you – but that’s not true. Never give up on yourself, because you’re worth mair than that.
“Reach out – find a place like this. You’ll never regret it.”
The inspiration behind the Shed
Sarah Everett works four days a week as a practice nurse at the nearby Govan Health Centre and has seen first-hand the particular issues that men face. That was the driver for the Men’s Shed.
“A lot of men come to see me for a range of things, and I realised that one of the main problems was isolation – many of them were bored, very disconnected, and as a result they didn’t have a lot of self-worth.
“When I heard about Men’s Shed I thought, that’s what we need here, so after securing funding we set up a group in the practice.
“At first there were five men, but that five quickly became 15 and we began to run out of room. Then we found our current premises and moved in on 1st January 2018.
“It was little more than a shell, but the men have turned it into a fantastic facility. The sense of pride for everyone is huge, and when I listen to the banter here – the laughter – it’s so rewarding.”
And Sarah is clear about the value of a place like the Shed – so much so that she commits one day a week as volunteer funding manager.
“Men need to feel like they have a purpose – that’s huge for them. When someone starts saying it’s easier just to stay at home that’s a real problem, and places like this are so important to prevent men getting into a downward spiral.
“Within five minutes you’re made to feel very welcome and instantly start to build relationships with other people, to join in with things and feel better about yourself.
“But on top of that, men are terrible for not looking after their health – I hear all the time it’s only a cough or I don’t want to bother the doctor. But that’s their job – you’re not wasting their time. And the experiences of the men here really help others to go and get a problem checked earlier.”
The doctor
Dr Kerri Neylon, a GP in Govan, is well aware of men’s reluctance to seek help early, but she knows that the example and support of others can be an important factor in encouraging them to overcome their fears.
Dr Neylon, who is Deputy Medical Director for Primary Care at NHS Greater Glasgow and Clyde, also hopes recent news about the health of the King, and his willingness to speak early about it, could help men to come forward.
She said: “Often I am told by patients that they didn’t want to come to see a GP because they were embarrassed, and it’s often the encouragement of others that acts as a catalyst for men to see about a health worry they have been putting off.
“In speaking so candidly about his own health issues, I have no doubt the King will be an important example, encouraging others to take a lead from him and make that first appointment. We wish him and his family well for whatever lies ahead.”
Dr Neylon often encourages her patients to attend the Men’s Shed, as she knows how valuable it can be for their mental and physical health.
She said: “The Men’s Shed in Govan is a really important resource for men to receive support and encouragement with issues affecting their health and wellbeing.
“Availability of easily accessible facilities such as these are of huge importance in tackling isolation and loneliness and provide a sense of belonging, and most importantly some laughter and fun.”
IMAGES: Scottish Sun
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